US road trip!!
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US road trip!!
And why I've decided a little more optimism is in order
I owe you all a newsletter! Last week I chose to unplug a little from the news cycle and focus on the here and now with my family. It felt all the more urgent as there have been a cluster of headlines recently, including some profound atrocities, that left me feeling that we’re in the midst a deeper darkness than just the seasonal winter. I set out to capture some of that mood at UnHerd last week; suffice say that the Easter story of resurrection has never felt more personal to me than this year - or more needed.
It’s the eeriest part of the story, and far harder to secularise or turn into a vending opportunity or a demand for money with menaces. It’s a gift; the return of all that was lost, and more, in the midst of darkest despair. I look at the doom-laden trajectories for our global economic order, for our disintegrating social fabric, for the plummeting birth rate, for countless other dark indicators of upheaval to come, and think: there’s a great deal to despair about. But despair is not the end of the Easter story. And it serves as a reminder to me that there’s little nourishment in despair, and plenty in hope. So having been relentlessly critical of tech recently, I have a piece in the works with some optimism on this front; watch this space.
I would also love to hear from readers who have been married a long time, and who might be willing to share a bit about weathering the ups and downs of a long relationship that you treasure in all its complexity. When our social bonds are so frayed these stories are harder to come by, and yet I feel certain they’re out there. If you have a story like this you’d be willing to share I would love to hear it in the comments.
On that more upbeat note, I’m heading to the USA in a couple of weeks! It’s not actually a road trip; the last time I did of those it was by Greyhound bus, about 20 years ago, and I have stories. But Feminism Against Progress publishes on 25 April in the USA, and I’m on a whirlwind East Coast tour to celebrate.
If you’re anywhere near that coast and want to come say hello, here’s where you will find me:
24 April: DC
12-1pm: Lunchtime discussion with American Conservative’s Micah Meadowcroft
Hillsdale College Kirby Center 227 Massachusetts Ave. NE Washington, DC 20002
6-8pm: Panel discussion with Christine Emba, Alexandra DeSanctis and Leah Libresco Sergeant
Catholic Information Center 1501 K Street NW Washington, DC 20005 United States
25 April: DC
11am-12 noon: Reactionary Feminism: Sex and the Market
The Heritage Foundation 214 Massachusetts Ave NE Washington, DC 20002
26 April: NYC
7pm: Launch party, hosted by Compact and First Things.
Georgia Room, 23 Lexington Ave, 2nd Floor, New York, NY.
Please RSVP to info@compactmag.com
27 April: Harvard
4:30pm Rethinking Feminism panel discussion, with Christine Emba and Louise Perry
Harvard College, CGIS South Tsai Auditorium
Hope to see some of you there - also don’t forget you can still sign up for the GoodReads giveaway here!
Till next time,
Mary
US road trip!!
I’ve been with my dh since I was 18, had our first baby straight after uni at 21. That baby is now 22 and we had three more. We’ve had so many ups and downs, so many times I’ve felt I’d outgrown him or didn’t even like him any longer. We’ve moved all over the country, both gone back to uni, lived on one salary so I could breastfeed until our babies self weaned etc. We have a joint goal that is our children and raising them. After a while I’d fall in love with him again. It takes time. Some months we are more like good friends. Other times we are in love again. I think that’s just part of growing up and changing. We decided all of those years ago we’d make a family. We are both very practical and also once we commit to something we don’t give up. Including in each other. We find things to love. And it works. It’s a decision we make over and over. We don’t even talk about it like this, it’s just an obvious thing - we stay together. We don’t argue much either, our children are on the whole happy and thriving. My Grandmother once said to me that the one thing about modern life she disliked was the propensity and ease at which couples just gave up and divorced. She was bewildered by it and had the attitude of - wherever you go there you are. Meaning your personal faults and flaws will only follow you into a new relationship so we ought to try really hard with our current life. I’ve really enjoyed listening to your interviews on various podcasts recently and hope to read your book.
Hi Mary, I'm very happily married for 18 years with 5 kids. Not sure if that is long (Grandma and Grandpa celebrated 70 yr anniversary recently). But I can relate to that need to hear about healthy and happy marriages -- I sometimes feel that people are curious to know if we are for real, it's almost like an unrealistic dream to many of my peers. They don't believe that happy families are real any more. That's not a story, but like I say, just avowing that it does/can work and it's a lovely thing is needed these days.
Clara